Funny how people tossing the name "Bayern" into the ring thereby demonstrating how they basically know nothing about that club. Of all clubs in the world, this is probably the club Pep is least likely to ever manage. There are golden rules in Munich - the profile of requirements to coach there are crystal clear:
The designated coach
- Must speak german - period.
- Must be an old friend of Hoeneß, Rummenigge or at least Beckenbauer or he's bearing the name Hitzfeld. If not, he's eyed very closely from day one.
- Must have played at the club with the exception of Lothar Matthäus who is even less likely than Pep to ever coach there. If not, same as above.
- Must never know more about the game than Uli Hoeneß. If he does, and Hoeneß finds out, he's immediately removed from the vicinity, forever shunned and branded as a "difficult person" in the next sky90 interview. In such occasions, the club may nevertheless feed off the posession style that coach teached these lame-ass players.
- Must always accept the players the "Uli-Hoeneß-lookalike-contest-winner" aka Christian Nerlinger wants to sign - no matter how lame they are.
- Must give an interview to BILD or Focus, or at least another magazine owned by Helmut Markwort, every two days - this can't be stressed enough.
- Must always pretend not to know that Philipp Lahm leakes dressing-room information to the magazines mentioned above in order to recieve high marks in their player rating.
- Must always field the players Nerlinger signed + never bench Lahm and Schweinsteiger no matter their form-curve.
- Must always keep silent in the dressing room if Hoeneß/Rummenigge/Nerlinger decide to show up and start yelling at the players and start throwing stuff through the dressing room. Afterwards, the coach has to repeatedly state he didn't even know they were there.
and, most importantly, never EVER use the players as he sees fit AND/OR change the formation that was used in the year before.
Ban the interwebz ! 
